The Perfect Plan, The Perfect Life

Does not exist. Perfection, expectations, external pressure, internal pressure, these are all things that can quickly make us unhappy if we allow them to control us. It’s important to always remember you are in the driver seat. You are in control of your own life AND it doesn’t have to be perfect. We all know things happen, surprises catch us off guard and things don’t always go as planned.

People often tease about not having expectations (or having low expectations) because then there won’t be any disappointment when things don’t go their way…maybe they’re right. When we remove the pressure, lower the super high standards and live mindfully we’re able to stay in the present moment and not worry about the past or the future. When we spend our time and mental energy focusing on the past or the future we formulate more stress and create unwarranted feelings of fear and regret.

Sit back, relax and let life happen. You’re still in control because (hopefully) you’re making your own decisions and choices. You’re taking action and making moves, but not trying to control the situation or the outcome. It’s not that you don’t care; it’s that you’re making an effort to live mindfully and let the universe work its magic.

Mindfulness means paying attention to things as they are in any given moment, however they are, rather than as we want them to be. My point exactly, there is no perfect plan or perfect life, imperfection is inevitable, and it’s beautiful.

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Blame it on the Night

(Reading time 2-3 minutes)

I’m sure by now you have heard this song, Blame it on the Night, by Calvin Harris. If not, no worries, you’ll still be able to pick up on the overall concept of this blog post. The song tells the story of a man who feels guilty about cheating on his partner, but is not willing to accept responsibility for his actions. Later, he apologizes and says that he’ll “be better” in the future.

So what’s the meaning behind the song and this concept of guilt? Guilt is one of the hardest feelings to live with, because you’re the reason you and the people you care about are hurting. You hurt them. How do you get rid of that hurt? How do you heal guilt? This song, Blame, walks a fine line between honesty – actually owning up, accepting responsibility for the pain inflicted and the harm done – and excuses. The end result is all too human – don’t blame it on me.

The song goes on to say, This ain’t a feelin’ I can keep…meaning, no one can carry around a lifetime’s worth of guilt. The question is how do you get rid of it? And how do you avoid it in the first place? Why is it so hard to forgive? And why is it so hard to own up to our own faults?

To help answer these questions, we should start by acknowledging that we blame because it’s easy. It’s easy to point the finger and fault someone else. It takes courage and maturity to own up to our own faults and mistakes. People who focus their attention on blame are not being mindful. They are not being honest with themselves. They’re insecure and scared.

Let’s lighten the mood a bit and put this concept into practice. I feel guilty when I eat a block of cheese, but instead of harboring guilt and blame, I have learned to acknowledge the fact that I did something wrong (over-consumption), accept it, and go on with my life. 🙂

It’s time we look in the mirror and stop hurting others. I think if we’re mindful of accepting responsibility for our actions, thoughts and feelings, we will be able to live a life of acceptance instead of a life of guilt.

The song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJb0VYVtaNc&noredirect=1

Sources: Bustle and MusicInsideU